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Hang up or order you Jackass!
Tell you me you haven’t seen this Jackass floating around town. This is the guy whose cell phone call is so important that he can’t hang up for the minute it takes to _______ (fill in blank). order coffee order food pay for gas pay for groceries etc. etc. Irrespective of the specifics, what this…
Jackass Number 15 – People who forward emails (part one).
This one is so bad it is a two-parter. A Jackass is someone who thinks it is their “job” to forward political or humorous emails to everyone in their address book. Well, that sort of defines SPAM doesn’t it? Well these emailing jackasses haven’t figured that out as everyday another message I could do without arrives in…
Jackass #25 – Yay-hoos who close their phone messages with a cliche.
When I want to leave a message all I really want to know is did I reach the right number/person. Everything else, is extraneous. I also don’t require directions. I pretty much have the whole message-leaving business under control. Leave it to the jackasses, however, to mess up this simple task. What began innocently enough,…
Put on a shirt you old, out-of-shape Jackass!
Some guys feel compelled to walk around with their shirts off. It’s weird. Frankly I just don’t get it. The truth is the overwhelming majority of guys look simply terrible without their shirts on. The fat, the patches of hair, sweat, tattoos, and best of all scars! It’s simply disgusting. Add to that the effects of aging! Even the seemingly ageless Iggy Pop has…
Jackass #22 – Morons who talk in movie theaters.
Hey Jackass, the movie we all paid to watch is in a theater not your living room. Sure, eat as loud you want, with your mouth open preferably. That is the jackass way to eat BTW. Intermittently belch and scratch your balls while you are at it (if you are a guy). But if you…
Jackass Number 1 – Cellphone guy
The cellphone guy is in the jackass hall of fame. In fact, cellphone guy will reappear many more times as part of the 1001 – one for each egregious behavior. Bluetooth can be a category all by itself. Don’t people understand they don’t need to keep that ear peice on everywhere they go? So let’s…